Out of retirement or just tired

Sticky

Last June, when the SCOTUS legalized same-sex marriage, I had to show up on the internets to gloat and to say, “Suck it, Scalia.” Associate Justice of the Supreme Court Antonin Scalia went to his reward on February 13, 2016, so I figured I had probably written my last blog that no one but relatives would read.

Since January of 2007, first as Gene Clark and then as the real me, I’ve blogged (it’s a word now) more than 300 times. I thought, “I’m 61 years old, I have a good job, and I want some peace and quiet.”

I wasn’t so much retired as just tired.

Then this anus of a man, this tiny-fingered rich bully boy, this panderer to the lowest instincts of hate, bigotry, sexism, and just plain assholishness started rolling up primary victories so that he may very well be the Republican nominee for President.

Donald (Baby Fingers) Trump wants to be President. That’s frightening enough. The fact that so many other people think it’s a good idea, chills me to the bone. I’m not so tired any longer.

Baby Fingers Trump (BFT) believes that he is always right and everyone that doesn’t agree with him needs to be punched in the face. That personality flaw is not unusual for a man with more money than compassion, but BFT gets his supporters to punch people in the face for him.

All the people at BFT rallies need are some spiffy brown shirts and some jack boots. They have the hitting, spitting and name calling down.

Last week, BFT gave orders to his nut brigade. He said he was afraid his supporters would riot at the convention in Cleveland this summer if the Republican Party succeed in keeping him from becoming its nominee. Make no mistake. That was BFT telling his supporters to riot in Cleveland if he doesn’t get his way.

BFT is scary but not surprising. The Republican Party went out and recruited its lunatic fringe (Tea Baggers) in two vain attempts to defeat Barack Obama. It was like the scene in Blazing Saddles when Hedley Lamar says, “I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.”

Boy, Howdy! Except, I’m sure the Tea Baggers would pass on the Mexican bandits and the bull dykes. Tolerance and diversity are not big in Tea Bagger circles.

This is a Bad News/Good News joke, except…The bad news is that BFT could be the Republican nominee…the Good News is that Ted Cruz may steal the nomination at a brokered convention.

Lindsey Graham told the Washington Press Club Foundation’s 72nd Congressional Dinner, “If you killed Ted Cruz on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was in the Senate, nobody would convict you.” Lindsey just endorsed Cruz, and nobody likes Cruz…except some of your crazier Godspato types…you know, snake handlers, strychnine drinkers, and speakers in tongues.

BFT gives credence to the fringe element. He’s got some Cracker Jack ideas:

  • Kill ISIS wives and children.
  • More torture
  • Bomb the shit out of (fill in the blank).
  • Too bad it’s not like the old days when there were penalties for protesting. (You know…police dogs, tear gas, rubber bullets, and fire hoses like when the black folks got all uppity back in the late 1960s.)
  • A flat-chested woman can’t be a 10.
  • If she weren’t my daughter, I’d ask her out.
  • We will build a wall, and Mexico will pay for it.
  • My dick is gigantic…trust me…no problem…really it is…honest…super-duper spectacular…stunning, really.

Donald (Baby Fingers) Trump is a dick joke. He’s a dick joke with an ego as big as he wishes his penis to be. BFT should not be President. Besides the fact that he is nucking futs and a royal asshole, he couldn’t give a fat rat’s ass about anyone else but BFT.

Now that I have a twitter account (@billdevol). I plan to insult Donald Trump daily. If I’m really lucky, he’ll respond.

He thinks he is smarter than the rest of the world because he has tons of cash. He isn’t, however, because he has to personally deal with every insult hurled at him. If President Obama was like that, his head would have exploded by now.

BFT could never handle that kind of pressure.

 

One More Thing:

I have heard Bernie Sanders supporters say that if Bernie isn’t the Democratic nominee, they plan to stay home on Election Day. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! If that happens, and Trump gets elected, I will blame those people forever. After all, if Nader voters hadn’t been ass hats, Dubya would never have happened.

Dear RNC – Bite My Ass

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Dear Republican National Committee:

First, I was wrong about blood flowing in the streets of Cleveland this past week. There is more violence at an 8-year-old’s birthday party than there was in Cleveland during the convention.

I owe you an apology. It’s just that your nominee is such a bat-shit crazy dictator wannabe that I thought a ritual sacrifice of an unwashed liberal was going to be part of the entertainment. Let me see if I’ve got this right:

  • The Black people that are angry because cops keep shooting their friends and relatives are racist thugs.
  • LGBT people that want equal protection under the law have a secret agenda that includes turning all our children into queers, and if you force them to pray hard enough God will turn gays into straights.
  • All people of the Muslim faith are terrorists and the safest thing for all us Christian people is to just stop any more Muslims from coming into America and working to get rid of the ones we already have.
  • People that disagree with your nominee (that orange guy with the tiny fingers) should be punched right in the mouth.
  • People of Mexican heritage can’t be trusted. They are drug dealers and rapists, and waves of illegal Mexican immigrants are flooding the borders and killing people before moving on to ruin our schools, hospitals, and even our language.
  • Criminals own the streets in America. It isn’t safe for law-abiding citizens to leave their homes and openly carry fire arms while looking to cap said criminals.
  • No one has a job. Unemployment is higher than it was when Dubya was President and damn near plunged the world into a depression.
  • Guns are proof that God loves you and wants you to be happy.
  • Barack Obama is the worst President, the most divisive President, the most anti-Christian President ever, and the only President that could possibly be worse is Hillary Clinton, whom by the way has rigged the system to keep herself out of jail.
  • Women that want equal pay for equal work are lesbo feminists bent on emasculating the white men that really built this country.
  • Anyone but white people are to be considered part of the “sub-groups” that have contributed little or nothing to civilization.
  • Donald Trump is magic. By the sheer force of his considerable ego he will cut taxes, increase government services, destroy the Islamic Jihad movement that has existed for centuries, force all trading partners to cut their own throats, force corporations that went off-shore back on shore with all the jobs that left with them, protect us from threats both foreign and domestic, and make America the best in all things around the world…oh, and the trains will run on time.

Bullshit.

The Republican Party is goose stepping along with people whose only hope of winning this Presidential election is to “Willie Horton” all the White people in America into believing that this election is Armageddon or Ragnarok for White/Christian dominance of our culture.

That’s what scares me the most. I always say there aren’t enough white people left to elect Donald Trump President, but, if voter suppression measures in several states are effective and Trump can scare the crap out of the average White voter, he has a shot at winning.

Donald Trump’s influence will be as small as his fingers if he is elected. He has created the fiction that the President has the power to do the things he promises to do just by barking orders.

Bullshit.

You beat the bushes eight years ago for the people that attended your convention this year. You thought a little bat-shit crazy could defeat Obama. It didn’t. Tea Baggers and Whites-only chuckle heads then took over your party.

So, Bite My Ass RNC.

Four things I liked this week:

  1. Who knew Ted Cruz had the balls to go to the convention and deliver a hearty and heart-felt “Fuck You” to Donald Trump. When asked about it, Cruz said (paraphrase follows) What, I’m going to go kiss the ass of the guy that insulted my wife, linked my Dad to JFK’s assassination, and called me a liar hundreds of times? Who do you think I am, Marco Rubio or Chris Christie?
  2. The speaker line up at the convention was spectacular: Melania Trump stealing Michelle Obama’s speech was just awesome. They had Plagiarism on Monday, Nepotism on Tuesday, a Misogynist VP candidate on Wednesday, and Baby Fingers himself on Thursday.
  3. Roger Ailes resigned as head of Fox News on Thursday. Samantha Bee of Full Frontal put it best yesterday in her tweet, “Ailes wanted @GretchenCarlson and @megynkelly to fuck him. And they just did.” That’s why Sam Bee is on TV.
  4. The RNC edition of Scene magazine was a work of art. It featured an adult RNC coloring book. My favorite page was the one below depicting Ted Cruz as the Zodiac Killer.

zodiac

Devilmon GO

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I used to go to the Carbon Hill Methodist Church. It was the kind of church where last week’s attendance and offering were up on a sign at the front of the church. If there were more than 20 people on any given Sunday, it would have been in all the papers.

I had this Sunday school teacher that would tell us Bible stories like she’d been there when it happened. “Then, Jesus said, Lazarus, get yourself out here. Everybody was really scared, but out came old Lazarus with all his grave clothes hanging on him.”

The teacher, Helen, made Jesus sound like a person you wanted to knowthat  just happened to be the son of God. When I think of Jesus, I think of someone kind and fiercely loyal, as well as immensely compassionate.

There is a nut bag preacher that has decided that Pokémon GO is a trick of the Devil that ISIS can use to find where Christians live and worship. I guess ISIS can’t use a phonebook and look these places up. It needs a satanic smart-phone app.

Rick Wiles runs a church and a web site. His web site is at http://www.trunews.com/. If you take a gander at his site, you will see that he is a purveyor of the line that Christians all over the world are being persecuted and murdered for their faith…Oh, and the End Times, as well.

Preachers have been preaching that the End Times are here ever since Jesus went to be with his Father. It is one of the single best ways to separate fools from their money and to scare people on fixed incomes into sending money instead of eating and paying the electric bill. After all, God will provide.

Interestingly enough, Rick’s posted beliefs include the belief that marriage is a threesome with God, one man, and one woman…I digress.

Before Rick was “called” by God to create his TruNews empire, he was in marketing and advertising. He learned the religious rip-off from some of the best while he served as the Marketing Director for Trinity Broadcasting Network. TBN is a network where preachers dress in expensive suits and have expensive shoes and wives that wear baby doll dresses and have pastel colored hair. TBN preachers always need you to send in what you can so they can keep the word of God on the airwaves.

Rick is really concerned with the latest craze sweeping the nation of people that must have very little to do. Rick wonders, “What if this technology is transferred to Islamic jihadists and Islamic jihadists have an app that shows them where Christians are located geographically?”

You see, Rick, the app is free. Islamic jihadists already have it, and your “cyber demons” are already running about looking for Christians to target.

Rick is worried that the game will eventually enslave people to the point that they will follow orders from the game to kill Christians.

I do not believe that Rick believes that Satan has anything to do with a smart phone app. I believe that Rick thinks this bullshit story will separate more than a few scared old ladies from their Social Security checks.

In my opinion:

  • Jesus is just like the man Helen described in Sunday school years ago
  • God must be pretty badass to have dreamed this all up and keep it running
  • Preachers with $1,000.00 suits and Rolexes that prey on the religious fears of others need to be extremely ashamed of themselves and kiss my ass

I had a great Uncle that told me he was called to be a preacher when he was struck blind and paralyzed in the woods many, many years ago. My Great Uncle John, his wife, and eight children hardly ever had two nickels to rub together, but Uncle John managed to do God’s work.

Wish Us Luck

This coming Monday the bat shit crazy convention comes to town. If Trump gets the nomination, there will be blood in the streets. If the RNC manages to screw Trump out of the nomination, there will be blood in the streets.

I have a gut feeling that this week will be Crude, Rude, and full of Attitude with guns. Oh, boy!

Please note…I just said that the blood would flow no matter what happens. I don’t trust any of the factions that will converge on Cleveland this week. This year will never go down in the history books as the “Year of Common Sense and Rational Discourse.”

If you don’t agree with me, I think I’m supposed to punch you in the mouth or send threatening emails to your Mom. I suppose I could post a YouTube video where I curse and scream ethnic slurs; that’s all the rage this year.

Target Practice

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If bad police officers kill good civilians and bad civilians kill good police officers in retaliation, how in the Jumping, Living Christ are we going to get ourselves out of this one?

Every time a nut with a gun kills people, the NRA and the “I have a big gun because my penis is so small” crowd say that if more people had guns, less people would get killed. The police already have guns, so if more civilians had guns, less civilians would get killed.

Except, civilians and police officers are dropping like flies up in here.

Here’s the rub…bad police officers are killing more Brown people than White people.

White people tell their children to respect and listen to the police. What do Brown people tell their children? Can they, in all good conscience, tell their children to respect and listen to the police?

The argument always goes something like this, if you just do what the police tell you to do, you’ll be fine. That doesn’t seem to hold true any longer. I’m about as white as they come, and I am scared of bad police. They have earned it, lately. I still respect good cops, but it seems you can’t tell the difference until they shoot you.

However, with me being White, the chances of me getting killed by bad police officers is way less than if I were Brown. Except, and this is already happening, Brown people are getting angry and scared enough to climb up on buildings to shoot White people and police officers.

If I had to make a prediction, I’d say that some angry and scared White people and police officers will climb up on buildings to shoot Brown people very soon. This will continue until we have our very own French Revolution and everybody’s heads start falling into baskets.

When I was in college, there was a bumper sticker that said. “If you don’t like the police, the next time you need help, call a hippie.” The bad cops in my day were cut of the same cloth as the sister-dating, knuckle-dragging mouth breathers that comprise the majority of bad cops today.

The hippie-hating time pretty much faded when cocaine replaced pot, polyester replaced denim, and platform shoes replaced sandals, but Black and Brown people have been ducking for cover from bad people since their ancestors arrived here in chains. This isn’t something people of color cooked up to get sympathy.

What if you got stopped when you were out just being white? What if you got pulled over in Black neighborhoods for DWW (Driving while White)? Liberals don’t make this up. Black people have targets on their backs at which bad police officers love to shoot.

After Dallas, getting shot for pretty much any damn reason by any damn angry and scared person is way more possible.

Here is my proposal.

Bad police officers would be less likely to open fire on civilians of color if all the other people of color standing around filming the assaults and murders had guns instead of cell phones. I believe that’s how the argument goes.

Bad civilians would keep it in their holsters if they knew everybody (not just the police) had a gun.

More guns and less background checks is the answer to public and police violence. According to the folks that post on my Facebook page, if each and every person had a gun, this world would be a perfect place. Everyone would be so scared of getting killed that they would be as gentle as lambs with each other.

I would go one step further. I have a friend whom lives in the Pacific Northwest now. He was originally from Missouri. He is an ex-Navy aviator. He helped keep the world safe from communism when he was a much younger man. He and his pilot would fly into North Vietnam and deter further violence against the citizens of South Vietnam with bombs and missiles.

He either had an idea or heard an idea about a “One-Free-Kill” society. In this society, everyone would get one free kill. There would be no investigation and no charges filed after you killed your first person for whatever reason.

Also, everyone would be armed.

If you had no idea which folks still had a free kill coming, you’d be on your best behavior at all times. Of course, this doesn’t stop your lone crazy from taking a bazooka he/she uses for rabbit hunting and leveling a day care center, but if the toddlers were all packing heat and still had their free kills, they could stop the nut before he killed too many of them.

Oh, what a wonderful world it would be. Mutually assured destruction was our policy during the Cold War with the Russians, and now it can be our policy in every-day America. We would be the envy of all the other countries on the planet.

OR

We could start to make sure that everyone that had a gun was sane and deserved to invoke their Second Amendment rights. We decide who can drive a car and fly a plane; why can’t we decide who can have a gun?

Crazy people will still drive, fly, and get guns, but I’d feel a whole lot better about our national resolve to not turn ourselves into a giant OK Corral. I just know I’d be a Clanton and not an Earp.

BS, I Love You

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I’ve been called an elite.

That’s pretty ridiculous seeing as how an elite is supposed to think they are better than others. “You went to college, so you think you are better than everybody else.”

That’s bullshit. I had my water turned off this Monday. It’s back on, now, but I’ve had my water, electric, gas, cable, and pretty much every utility turned off at least once since I’ve been what you call an adult. I consider myself just like every other person trying to get from cradle to grave on this planet.

I don’t think I’m anything but human,

Here are the real reasons I went to college:

  • I am a lazy person that hates to do manual labor.

  • I wanted to avoid the draft during the Vietnam War as long as I possibly could.

  • Teaching was a birth defect in my family.

When I was 15, I got a summer job cutting weeds along Ward Township road ditches with what is called a scythe (think Grim Reaper).

reaper scythe

A guy named Shorty who smoked Phillip Morris Commanders would pick us up in a truck and haul us from one sewer ditch to another where we would smoke, curse, cut weeds, smell shit, and sweat our balls off.

philip morris

I remember thinking one day, “I hate this shit. I better go to college so I can work inside instead of outside.”

By the time I finished high school, America was dispatching her non-college bound young men to Southeast Asia to try their luck at not dying. My Dad had been there twice. Guys a year older than I was had been drafted.

I wanted to dodge the draft, but I didn’t want to go to prison.

It was 1972. If I went to college and was accepted into ROTC, they wouldn’t draft me. If I dropped out of ROTC following my sophomore year in college, I wouldn’t have to commit to the military…I’d be eligible for the draft…but I was betting the war would be over by then.

I enrolled in college, I took the Air Force Officers Qualifying Test and the Air Force physical. I failed both. I flunked the physical because of my terrible eyesight. The Air Force doctor told me that the Marines wouldn’t even take me. I was happy.

My heroes had always been cowboys…and teachers. I was never going to make a living as a cowboy, but I thought I could be a teacher, My grandfather, grandmother, uncle, great uncle, and father were teachers. Dad had retired from the Navy and went to college and became an elementary school teacher.

Teachers like Lenore Sickles, Roberta Burson, and Bruce Rogers taught me to think about what I was told. They said, judge actions and not words. They said think for yourself.

I went to public school and attended college through assassinations, lynchings, race riots. Vietnam, the bombing of Cambodia, the Kent State killings, Watergate, and the resignation of a President. My country was up to its eyeballs in bullshit the whole time.

I learned from the examples I saw every day, That’s when my bullshit detector and ability to bullshit started getting really good.

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You know the saying, “You can’t bullshit a bullshitter?”

Well, Baby, I am a great bullshitter. I would even venture to say that I am an elite bullshitter. It may be the only thing I feel I can do better than most people.

When people call “elitism” or bitch about “political correctness,” I can smell the bullshit. These arguments are the last refuge of the white man that sees the playing field shifting and evening out. They fear that they won’t automatically get all the cards dealt in their favor any longer.

Don’t tell me I think I’m better than everyone when the truth is I think I’m no better than anyone.

I want to be treated fairly. I want equal protection under the law. I want to be free to love whom I love and worship (or not worship) whom I worship…AND…as long as my living my life that way doesn’t stop other people from living their lives that way…everything is copacetic.

I hear that white men are the only group you still can legally discriminate against in America, and I scream, “BULLSHIT,” as loud as I can.

Way too many white men and women in this country are scared of equality. They are scared because they turned a blind eye toward discrimination based on race, gender, religion, and sexual orientation for years and years because they benefited from it.

Here come the chickens and they want to roost on your asses.

 

 

Summer Blockbuster

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Before I get started this week:

I woke up this morning to learn that the UK voted to get out of the EU. It makes me sad. I feel like there is an Arch Duke somewhere whose days are numbered. I feel like the League of Nations just fell apart.

Call me paranoid, but history repeats itself because it’s the story of the human race. When it comes to fucking up a good thing, we can be counted on to do so in spades.

One commentary I heard before the Brexit vote compared the folks that voted to get out of the EU in England to the “Trump” voters in America. I think they were referring to the xenophobic and racist nature of both kind of voter. (You Trump voters go ahead and look up the big words; we will wait.)

I sure hope the Brexit plebiscite wasn’t a precursor to our election in November. I really can’t imagine an America that would elect Donald Trump as its President. Honestly, I know we survived 8 years of Dubya, but the idea of Trump in charge makes my balls crawl up inside my abdomen and refuse to come back down.

I thought this week’s rant was born of the fear of Donald “Baby Fingers” Trump, but this Brexit vote give me a new perspective. I think Trump scares me so badly because 13,000,000 people have already decided they think he’s just the cat’s ass. They are everywhere. I pass by them every day and don’t even realize it until they say something stupid.

It’s time I got back to my original, regularly-scheduled rant. Next week, I will not write about Donald Trump unless he does something totally stupid…on reflection, next week’s rant will probably feature Donald Trump.

onwith the show

Summer is the time when Hollywood does its best to separate us from our money.

Superhero movies, horror movies, rollicking comedies, science fiction, and movies with lots of guns, bullets, and explosions are sure to earn a healthy piece of change this summer. Remakes of old, successful movies are popular also. Remakes are seldom successful, but I hope Ghostbusters is really good. It’s all a crap shoot.

Here in the greater Cleveland area, we’ve had the Cavaliers win the NBA championship. Many people outside of Cleveland would call that science fiction, but they can suck it until it’s raw.

The Cleveland MLB team is 11 games above .500, and their pitching looks solid. We can only hope their play continues to keep them in first place in our division and that we get a crack at the World Series. That might be a Mission Impossible scenario, but I’d buy a ticket to that.

With all that sports action going on, we are still waiting for the real blockbuster of the summer. This will be the story of the year. It will be in all the papers…The Republican National Convention will be held at the Quicken Loans Area right in the heart of Cleveland from July 18 to July 21.

Donald “Baby Fingers” Trump will come to town with enough delegates (on paper) to win the GOP nomination on the first ballot. Will he just pick up the nomination and hit the campaign trail to do battle with Hillary, or will the GOP go all Game of Thrones on him and have its own Battle of the Bastards.

“Gentlemen and Broads, may I have your attention please. First, I’d like to introduce, fighting out of New York by way of New Jersey, wearing the gray, $100,000.00 Alexander Amosu Vanquish II Bespoke suit which was delivered in an armored car and comes with 18-carat gold and diamond buttons, the man with a plan to make America Great Again with his own enormous hands….Donnnnnnnaaaallldddd Trrrrrrrummmmp!”

“Now for the challenger, fighting out of God-knows-where, wearing a big black cloak of shame for not winning the nomination during the Primary season, someone that wants to convince you to dump Trump and that they have a snowball’s chance in Hell of beating Hillary Clinton…Some guy no one wanted in the first place….(fill in the blank).”

Either way it goes…Trump taking the marbles and thanking no one but himself and just maybe his third wife…OR…the internal GOP bloodbath that would come from wrenching the nomination away from Baby Fingers…Cleveland will be Cleaveland for the 4 days of the convention.

If the GOP doesn’t challenge the Trump nomination, anti-Trump protestors will clash with Trump supporters in battles that will require police intervention and maybe tear gas, wooden bullets, or even worse.

If the GOP tries to throw Trump out the window, Trump supporters both inside and outside Quicken Loans Arena will spontaneously combust. They will spew hatred and violence throughout the city.

This is going to be a blockbuster any way you slice it. I don’t look forward to the mayhem.

Falsies

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What do 9/11, the murders at Sandy Hook elementary school, the murders in the movie theatre in Aurora, Colorado, the Boston Marathon bombing, and the recent nightclub murders in Orlando all have in common?

According to many people…they never actually happened…OR…they didn’t happen the way the official stories say they did.

There are some really sick Sons-of-Bitches out there that will look you in the eye and tell you that nobody died at Sandy Hook elementary. Nope, nobody. The grieving parents were actors. The public officials were actors. There were no dead children buried…it was all a False Flag operation designed to raise public outcry and make it easy for the “Gov-mint” to get your guns.

The same people will agree that people died at the Twin Towers on 9/11. Even they can’t explain away all the body parts littering the rubble at ground-zero…and several blocks in all directions. It happened, but it wasn’t terrorists…it was the “Gov-mint.” The “Gov-mint” wanted to have an excuse to go blow up Muslims in Iraq so they could grab all the oil…which we never did…or to fatten the pockets of Halliburton and other cronies of Dick Cheney…which we did.

The prevailing theory, as of less than a week out from the Pulse nightclub slaughter was that it didn’t really happen. There wasn’t enough blood on the “supposed” survivors. There was hardly any blood on the first responders (both official and members of the general public). No mass murderer calls 9-1-1 in the middle of a rampage. It’s the “gov-mint” (this time, led by the socialist Muslim President and not the Baptist, Texan President that was in charge during 9/11).

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In the Orlando case, the “gov-mint” wants to get their hands on your guns. That damn Obama has been trying to get your guns ever since he got elected…except he hasn’t. It’s Hillary. It the Illuminati. It’s the Freemasons. It’s the fucking Easter Bunny.

People that just go on and on about the Second Amendment until you wish they would turn their assault rifles on themselves will tell you that the Founding Fathers knew that one day the “gov-mint” would turn on its citizens and commence to killin’ them. If’n citizens had guns, the “gov-mint” couldn’t start killin’ folks without a fight.

That’s right, a mob of well-armed, shit-kickin’, hillbilly, swinging dicks is all that separates us form the “gov-mint” (which, by the way is us) marching into our town and killing us, forcing our daughters to have sex with brown people, and forcing our sons to have butt sex with drag queens.

If these “good guys with guns” should ever be disarmed, society would break down. The “gov-mint” would send death squads to roam the countryside to randomly shoot people that were really being no trouble in the first place.

There is no percentage in running a police state. Most of the profits go for bullets and jackboots, and the populace gets less productive so you have to buy more bullets and more jackboots and it spirals into the collapse of society and marks the beginning of the Mad Max world all the doomsday preppers and conspiracy nuts have been wet dreaming about for the last 75 years.

I am a card-carrying, liberal, pinko, hippie low life, and I think these believers in False Flags (let’s call them Falsies) are full of shit clear up to their mirror-sun glass covered eyeballs. Just go type “False Flag” in a search engine and have your mind fucked by the sheer volume of people that believe this shit.

Falsies are people with no empathy…or…are people that were dropped on their heads way too many times when they were infants.

It is easier for them to believe in some elaborate “gov-mint” takeover scenario rather than believing that there are bigots and crazy people of all kinds in our society and that we have a responsibility to try to fix the nutty bin we call America. For God’s sake, Donald Trump is going to be the Republican candidate for President.

There is only one reason to own a semi-automatic, military-grade assault rifle that can fire 45 rounds a minute. If you regularly get attacked by platoon-sized herds of rabid Deer, you could justify owning an AR-15.

In closing, I really shouldn’t be surprised that there are Falsies in this world. There are people that deny the Holocaust…wait, what if was 6,000,000 Jews and Gypsies faked their deaths just to give Nazis a bad reputation.

Crap, there goes sarcasm getting me into trouble again…except you know I’m not the first person to say something like that…and the saddest thing of all is that there are people willing to believe it.

Many people live in the state of Denial, but Falsies want to live in the state capital.

Sarcasm – one of the services I provide

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Last week, I attempted to use sarcasm. I enumerated all the reasons that Donald Trump was an asshole, but (very much like the candidate himself) I then suggested something that really makes no never mind as my reason for not supporting him.

That’s what Trump does.

  • Megyn Kelly asks Trump a really tough question about what he says about women, and Trump, not only doesn’t answer the question asked, he suggests that Ms. Kelly must be suffering from a hormonal imbalance caused by her uterus.
  • Someone told Donald Trump that Mexico said they wouldn’t pay for his dream wall. Donald said, “The wall just got 10 feet higher.”
  • Marco Rubio scored some substantial points against Donald Trump early on the campaign trail, and in the next debate, Trump suggested that Senator Rubio had a small penis. Later, Trump doubled down on the inappropriate by suggesting he not only has a large penis but he also hears no complaints when he uses it to have sex.
  • When a judge rules that some court documents should be released, and those documents reveal just what a scum-sucking businessman he is, Trump says the judge is a hater and a Mexican…which we know from Trump’s earlier comments makes the judge a drug dealer and a rapist.
  • People say things about Trump like what an asshole he is, and Trump promises to change the libel laws when he’s President so people that say things he doesn’t like can be sued for “lots of money.”
  • People say Trump isn’t qualified by temperament or intelligence to be President, and Trump has a hemorrhage and can’t stop himself from tweeting insults and name calling from the campaign podium.

With all those examples of what as asshole Donald Trump is, I sarcastically suggested that his unfortunate choice in hairstyles was the best reason not to vote for him. It was sarcasm. You shouldn’t NOT vote for Donald J. Trump because he is an asshole. His hair is just a bonus reason to dislike him.

Some reactions to my headline last week were along the lines of, “WTF is with your beard.” That’s a point well taken.

Anyway, let’s not discuss the pros and cons of Donald J. Trump. Let’s try to figure out WTF is up with my beard.

My beard is getting pretty long. As more hair disappears from the top of my head, more hair grows from the bottom of my face. This current incarnation of my beard dates back to Christmas time in 1978. The last time I shaved, I was 23 years old.

I was teaching high school in Vinton County, Ohio. I started shaving daily because it was my first job. I must have thought shaving would help me keep my $8,300.00-a-year teaching salary rolling in. Please feel free to laugh your ass off at my school portrait from the fall of 1978.

me again

I hated shaving. My face burned and broke out, so at Christmas time that year I decided that I was done shaving. They could fire me if they wanted. I think my beard was the least of the reasons my Principal Tom Jenkins wanted to fire me…it probably had something to do with sarcasm.

I didn’t get fired, but I spent a lot of time in the Principal’s office. I’ve had a beard ever since.

My beard used to be real red. It took forever to grow above my jawline. Now my beard is almost totally white. I think I look like Santa Claus. Little kids have stopped me and asked for specific toys as it gets closer to Christmas each year. I even go out in December with a Santa hat jammed on my head.

I haven’t even trimmed my beard since August of 2014. That was when my family threw me a really cool 60th birthday party. Somewhere on my Facebook page, I have the pictures of me in the Zorro suit my sister got me for my birthday. I even keep a copy of that picture in my cube at work. I look like a fat Anthony Hopkins as the old Zorro in The Mask of Zorro with Antonio Banderas and Catherine Zeta-Jones.

I have no desire to trim it, now. Gail would like me to have it shaped, but I like it just the way it is. Maybe I’ll comb my beard over my head when I finally go bald…it’s a look.

None of this beard talk has a damn thing to do with the asshole that is Donald J. Trump, but Trump supporters would love to talk about anything else (even my beard) than face the fact that they are supporting a man that excites them because he openly says stupid, racist, and sexist things.

The next time someone tells you they like Trump because he says what they think, urge them as strongly as you possibly can to seek counseling.